Group Friendship Skills…

Being at school provides plenty of opportunities for children to develop their communication and friendship skills.  At times it can be quite difficult and challenging to find a group that is fun to be with and where everyone is also kind and respectful.  I recently worked with a group of students to help resolve some of their friendship issues.  One issue was that they couldn’t agree on what they should all play together at lunchtime, with some students wanting to do one activity while others wanted to play something else.  They all thought that if they didn’t do the same activity together that they weren’t being good friends and a being a close-knit group.

Doing things together helps to cement friendships by building common ground and having fun experiences to discuss and laugh over.  In this case though, being forced to play something by the peer pressure of the larger group was causing resentment and division.

In the discussions with the group, they realised that being a good friend means that:

• You don’t need to do everything together to be friends
• There are lots of different opportunities to enjoy being together e.g. eating times, group work in class, playdates, etc.
• It’s okay to let others step away to do other things without that impacting on the friendship circle
• There will be times where smaller sub-groups within the group do things together, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t all be friends together
• You need to let each other take turns at deciding what to do, giving everyone an opportunity to have a voice
• We all have moments, different needs and feelings that influence what we want to do each day. Sometimes we want to have a quiet lunch, reading, drawing or sitting and chatting, while other lunchtimes we may want to run around, play sport, or be silly.  We need to leave room for our friends to choose where they want to play.

Even though this was a school lunch-time issue, we can all learn from the group skills needed to be a good friend and to apply to our own adult friendship groups.  Do you have expectations of your friends that can cause division or disappointment?  Do you need to change how you interact with your group of friends? 

Coming up…

6/9 – NEW DATE!! for Sub and Drink Deal Day.  Envelopes have been sent home this week, or you can use the attached form.  Please return to the box in the library by 9am Thursday 2/9.

There are still a few “Annie” activity packs still available for $3 each.  The pack includes a QR code to access the movie at home, 4 x pages of Annie activities, some craft fun, and a small sugary treat. Please email me if you are interested, and I’ll make arrangements to send home with your children. 

Blessings, Chappy Jenny